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no long intro here guys I’m going to teach you how to fight a fricking shark this is epic how to you if you’re worried about shark attacks you can calm the Frick down because they don’t happen very often 2015 there were just 98 unprovoked shark attacks sound scary but you have a higher risk of drowning at the beach than getting eaten by a shark 132 times higher to be exact you’re welcome seriously according to research from the New England Journal of Medicine four people died from a sand hole collapsed on a shark attack yes you have a higher chance of dying from sand than a shark attack but shark attacks do happen and before you find yourself on the business end of a shark’s mouth it’s important to know what you’re up against there are around 480 different species of shark but three are most responsible for attacks great white tiger and bull sharks bull sharks are unique in that they can survive in both fresh and saltwater and prefer to live in rivers and other shallow waters they are extremely territorial and will stop at nothing to defend their turf or in this case their surf they even have been known to bite horses that dares a drink from their water tiger sharks dislike colder temperatures and mostly live in tropical or warmer seas they prefer to hunt at night and are known to eat anything in their path even inedible things like trash bags and license plates pickles hate pickles great white sharks are the oceans top predators they can swim up to 35 miles per hour and have seven rows of teeth unlike other sharks great whites will hunt in packs taking down even the most clever aquatic creatures like dolphin seal there are also some of the smartest creatures in the ocean scientists have found that great whites can learn up to 80 times faster than cats or rabbits weird stat all sharks possess an extraordinary sense of smell that can sniff out one part of blood for every 1 million parts of water that’s like being able to smell it teaspoon of blood in a swimming pool amongst all that pee not only that but they can smell these tiny particles from hundreds of meters away sharks also have the ability to sense other animals electrical field basically sharks are superheroes there they did the x-men should just have Wolverine Jubilee Cyclops and shark attacks happen worldwide but the United States has been most with 53 unprovoked attacks in 2015 shark attacks are particularly bad and guess which state yeah yep yep yep yep yep yep Creek in Florida so he’s frickin Florida six of the top ten beaches with the most shark attacks are located there with a new smear no beach having the most shark attacks of anywhere in the US the best way to beat a shark is to never get into a fight with one at all follow these tips and you’ll lower your risk of encountering a shark in the ocean don’t swim at night at night you can’t see the shark coming but they can sure as hell see it smell you with dirty Birds avoid swimming your mouths of rivers Inlet channels or anywhere where lots of small fish congregate as sharks love to feed in these areas take off your jewelry before you go in the water even though they’re smart sharks confuse the light and flaking off a gold watch with fish scales and think they found their next meal be with other people when you’re in a group sharks are more afraid to attack if you’re going out in shark-infested waters you should bring along some gear to help give you the edge like a bazooka it may not seem fair but in a fight with the sharks you need all the help you can get an Australian company is mating wetsuits specifically designed to ward off sharks the blue and white striped suit is hard for sharks to see making it easier for you to avoid getting bit there’s also electromagnetic shark repellent these devices creating an electromagnetic wave that induces spasms in the Sharks snout sharks hate that crap a lot so they’ll actually stay like 20 feet away from you it’s pretty dope you’re also going to want a shark stick even if you’re not going out into the water you should just have a shark stick this is a firearm with a chamber that holds just one bullet usually a 357 magnums that’s attached to either a spear or a spear gun since it’s designed to work underwater it’s the best offensive tool you have against a shark that’s trying to eat you which would suck now if you encounter a shark your first instinct should be to leave the water do it quickly but don’t panic make sure you stay in a vertical upright position if you swim horizontally it makes it a lot easier for the shark to bite you and don’t turn your back to the shark studies have found that sharks will stop pursuing you if you face them and make yourself look like a threat wave your arms and thrash your feet to look as big and intimidating as possible this will scare most sharks into think you’re a threat and therefore they’ll be kept at bay now if a shark keeps circling you’re in the clear however if it hunches back beware it’s about to attack and trust me you definitely don’t want to be bit by a shark I don’t know from experience I’m just using context clues like pictures of other people bit by frickin sharks here’s some of those fun right moving on when sharks attack they don’t go for the quick kill a shark will bite off your individual limbs and swallow them whole cock then they’re going to chew on your torso while you bleed to death awesome and gross-rosen so when a shark rushes at you the first thing you’re going to want to do is cut off the angles of attack a shark is much more mobile than you duh and can come at you from all sides so back yourself into a rock or a reef this will force the shark to come at you straight on preventing the shark from sneaking up on you from behind and then you’re going to want to hit the start with some sort of improvised weapon like your scuba gear or a rock you can’t find one your fists will do hit the shark as hard as you can one of its weak spot the nose skill stop or eyes blink hopefully this will be enough to scare the shark into thinking you’re a threat and send it packing and don’t play dead thinking the Sharks going to go away if a shark thinks you’re dead it’s going to keep biting you – a shark dead prey means easy meal if you’re going to be dinner they can earn it said Clint Eastwood in a movie probably you did it bought a shark and you live to tell the tale now let’s see if these tips work in a sharknado starring ion ziering it’s pronounced in I am knock it off this has been an epic ow – hey folks epic out she was taking a little break for the summer yours truly has to go raise orphans and nurse them with my man parts you can do it if you do it long enough your body adapts science but don’t you fear because we’ve got a brand new show coming your way it’s called how it’s destroyed and it’s all about how things are completely obliterated aka destroyed it’s in the title self-explanatory I don’t want to hold your hand all the time and holding your hand for a long time that’s why I’m going to go nurse orphan so check it out learn something till next time I’m Joe Bereta and this has been at the cow – hey you you a fan man-at-arms of course you are you’re on army well good news buckaroo man-at-arms is coming to TV with a brand new series airing on El Rey starting June 8th check out the trailers here bye